An Irish Jig

I have been toiling for the last few days over how to accurately put this last weekend into words…

Every year, Spectrum Health puts on a 5K run/walk called the Irish Jig the week leading up to St. Patrick’s Day. This year, the race proceeds benefitted colorectal cancer. With my recent diagnosis in mind, my high school friend, Ashley Brennan, organized a group of my friends and family to take part in the race on my behalf.

As I entered the East Grand Rapids gym on Saturday morning before the start of the race, I was overwhelmed to see 40+ friends and family members there to support me. In a sea of green and shamrocks and leprechauns were friends from grade school and high school, friends of my brothers, co-workers, and even parents of friends that showed up. My high school prom date, Matt Korte, brought me flowers that were reminiscent of the nosegay he gave me on prom night in 1998. My brothers and sisters-in-law had coordinated to have “Mary Princess Warrior” t-shirts made, and Ashley had “Team Mary” fandanas printed. There was also a huge sign that said “Five Hopes for One Fear” in honor of this blog and my journey. As I saw my friends Derek and Matt holding that sign above the crowd in the gym for the first time, I was completely overcome with emotion and gratitude. Throughout the race, I had friends join me at the finish line and even had friends that were unable to make it but sent me loving texts and messages to tell me they were with me in spirit.

Through this journey I have already learned so many things, but the depth of gratitude I have felt is probably the most unbelievable and life-changing for me. How grateful I am is the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep. I have said this on my blog several times before, but I don’t know how I will begin to pay back the love, support, kindness, and prayers that all of you have offered to me without any expectations attached. At some point, I know I will figure it out. And I will never again under estimate the power of “showing up” for people when they need you in whatever form it might be.

Looking back over my life, it seems many of my experiences of God’s love have come in times of hardship and they have often come through the actions and humanity of those around me. This weekend is the perfect example. It is clear to me that just as much as I need this reflection of God at the moment, I must also strive to reflect that love back.

For those of you that know me well, you know one of my idols has always been Mother Teresa. My Aunt Mary introduced me to her and her works at a young age, and I have come to appreciate her even more in adulthood. She wrote and said a daily prayer I have loved for a long time, but it has come to have so much more meaning over the last few weeks. So for tonight, I will leave you with that prayer…

Dear God, help me to spread Thy fragrance everywhere I go. Food my soul with Thy spirit and love. Penetrate and possess my whole being so utterly that all my life may only be a radiance of Thine. Shine through me and be so in me that every soul I come in contact with may feel Thy presence in my soul. Let them look up and see no longer me but only you. Stay with me and then I shall begin to shine as you shine, so as to shine as to be a light to others. Amen.

Thank you again for a weekend that is going to help carry me through this tough road.

From the bottom of my heart… XO